My One Change That Worked: How I Overcame After-Work Tension Through an Unexpected Discovery in the Attic

One often feel like a coiled spring once the workday ends. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut would be followed by the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Then, a few months ago, I came across an old school recorder belonging to my grown son up in the loft. Curious, I blew into it, immediately transported back to the days when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.

Instead of throwing it away, I took it down, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I took recorder classes in primary school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and got a fingering guide on paper. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and begged me to quit), but I kept going – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. Forgetting notes easily meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breathing slowed down, my attention sharpened, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Now, several months later, I can handle other children’s songs and a passable Ode to Joy. Sure, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it’s purely about the joy it provides and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, and my son’s childhood.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I am in my own little world. Afterward, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends think it’s hilarious, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is precious at my age. For daily wellness, it’s truly an ode to joy.