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I am someone who believes that it is never too late to change. I think you absolutely are able to teach an old dog new tricks, on the condition that the old dog is willing and willing to learn. Provided that the person is willing to admit when it was mistaken, and work to become a more enlightened self.

OK yes, I am the old dog. And the trick I am attempting to master, although I am set in my ways? It is an important one, a feat I have battled against, often, for my all my days. I have been trying … to develop a calmer response toward huntsman spiders. Apologies to all the different eight-legged creatures that exist; I have to be realistic about my potential for change as a human. The target inevitably is the huntsman because it is imposing, dominant, and the one I run into regularly. Including a trio of instances in the recent past. Within my dwelling. Though unseen, but I'm grimacing and grimacing as I type.

I doubt I’ll ever reach “admirer” status, but my project has been at least attaining a standard level of composure about them.

A deep-seated fear of spiders dating back to my youth (unlike other children who are fascinated by them). During my childhood, I had plenty of male siblings around to ensure I never had to confront any personally, but I still freaked out if one was clearly in the general area as me. One incident stands out of one morning when I was eight, my family unconscious, and attempting to manage a spider that had ascended the living room surface. I “managed” with it by positioning myself at a great distance, practically in the adjoining space (lest it ran after me), and discharging half a bottle of bug repellent toward it. It didn’t reach the spider, but it succeeded in affecting and disturb everyone in my house.

With the passage of time, whoever I was dating or sharing a home with was, as a matter of course, the most courageous of spiders in our pairing, and therefore tasked with managing the intruder, while I produced low keening sounds and beat a hasty retreat. In moments of solitude, my method was simply to leave the room, turn off the light and try to erase the memory of its being before I had to return.

In a recent episode, I visited a companion's home where there was a notably big huntsman who resided within the window frame, for the most part hanging out. In order to be less fearful, I envisioned the spider as a 'girlie', a gal, part of the group, just chilling in the sun and overhearing us gab. It sounds rather silly, but it had an impact (to some degree). Put another way, making a conscious choice to become less phobic proved successful.

Whatever the case, I’ve tried to keep it up. I reflect upon all the sensible justifications not to be scared. I am aware huntsman spiders pose no threat to me. I know they eat things like flies and mosquitoes (creatures I despise). I am cognizant they are one of nature’s beautiful, harmless-to-humans creatures.

Alas, they do continue to move like that. They travel in the deeply alarming and borderline immoral way conceivable. The sight of their multiple limbs carrying them at that frightening pace causes my caveman brain to go into high alert. They claim to only have a standard octet of limbs, but I believe that increases exponentially when they move.

However it is no fault of their own that they have unnerving limbs, and they have an equal entitlement to be where I am – possibly a greater claim. My experience has shown that implementing the strategy of making an effort to avoid instantly leap out of my body and retreat when I see one, trying to remain composed and breathing steadily, and consciously focusing about their positive qualities, has actually started to help.

Simply due to the reality that they are furry beings that move hastily with startling speed in a way that haunts my sleep, doesn’t mean they merit my intense dislike, or my shrieks of terror. I am willing to confess when I’ve been wrong and fueled by baseless terror. I’m not sure I’ll ever make it to the “scooping one into plasticware and escorting it to the garden” stage, but you never know. A bit of time remains within this veteran of life yet.